I’m tired of people thinking anorexia is a choice.
That I would willingly do something so dangerous as to not eat and risk my life. For what? Fun?
I’m tired of people thinking I’m not trying.
As if you’re somehow in my head with all the voices screaming at me for even so much as looking at food, much less touching it. Why? Because I enjoy feeling defeated and hopeless?
This is not my choice. And I am never not trying. It’s not a game, it’s my life, and right now I’m not running the show.
Never doubt my intentions are to be back to hosting soon, though. I just am not ready right now. And I wish people understood what that meant.